The Dad placed a yellow lego on top of the blue lego tower he and his son had just built, and announced it was a “searchlight.”. The pre-schooler wailed, “No, No, just blue.” What is a good parent to do? After all, why do we play with our children, other than to make them happy? Well, another reason we play with our children is to teach them how to play well with others. If the Dad removes the yellow lego, he has taught his son that he gets to control the play ideas of a playmate. Ideally the Dad might say, “I really like the idea of a searchlight. When you play with other people they get to have ideas too.” If the child persists in removing the “searchlight” and the Dad quietly says, “Okay, I guess you would like to play by yourself,”and leaves without reprimand, the child learns an important life lesson: playmates will go away if there is no room for their ideas.

Key Idea: Every misbehavior shows a parent what the child needs to learn.